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Hope Knosher

Look to the Horizon with Hope

When I began my journey of healing, I was beat down by life. I had ignored my internal compass for a long time, and my body and my mind were paying a hefty price. I found myself in a cycle of never ending physical challenges and I felt as if my world was crumbling under my feet.  I was diagnosed with autoimmune problems and then as infertile. I was told that I could not conceive another child. I had one young daughter at the time, and I knew in my heart that I was going to have another girl–even if the doctor flatly said it wasn’t possible. I also knew medications and “learning to live with it” were not the answer for me.

I knew I needed to do something different.  I radically changed my diet and lifestyle.  The changes seemed to be working, and I began to feel better. To the amazement of my doctors I got pregnant, but had a heart-breaking miscarriage at 14 weeks. However, I didn’t give up hope. Eventually I became pregnant again and gave birth to a healthy baby girl—the second daughter I’d held in my heart for so long. Although the lifestyle changes I had made left me feeling much better, there was a missing component to my healing, which I would not grasp until years later.

In early May of 2009, I was awakened by a sharp pain in my right breast. I had a piercing thought that this might be a sign of breast cancer. Although I eventually got back to sleep, that internal voice lingered. After a series of tests a doctor visit confirmed that insistent voice, as I was diagnosed with breast cancer.  In that instant my whole world changed.

There was no medical explanation for the pain that I had encountered. It is true that messages are delivered in many forms. I was glad that I had been aware enough to hear and open enough to listen to my inner knowing.  I began a hard road of decisions, treatments, and eventually surgeries, at one point developing a bacterial…

Hope Knosher

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active 9 months, 2 weeks ago