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Aisha-Sky Gates

Premium Plus Member
Life-positive counseling for all alternative lifestyles. Relationship coaching. Leadership mentor.

About Aisha-Sky

Street reporter. Mom. Trauma survivor. Organizational development consultant. Faculty development advisor. Relationship coach. Counselor. Mentor. Author.

I invite you to learn all you can from the deep traumas that I have overcome and the life path that I have walked.  Experience me as a relationship coach and alternative lifestyle counselor and as author.  A counseling client once said, "When I tell you what I've done you aren't going to want to have anything to do with me."  I sad, "Tell me. I'll still be right here. Please tell me."

I love to coach

I grew up loving puzzles and watching people.  As a life coach I have been privileged to assist individuals through big life changes such as Empty Nest Syndrome, second and third career choices, and, sometimes, making the decision to end a marriage.  In every case the client led the way and I offered the right question to aid their thinking, resources if needed, emotional support, and tools for analyzing their own situation for the sake of clarity.

I love counseling

Sometimes a counseling client has come to me at just the right moment in their life.  "The right moment" for them is always a moment rich with energy and they are ready to move, to leap, to become more than their upbringing ever led them to believe was possible.  A therapist friend of mine says that counseling is about getting your own feet dirty as you slip into the muck that's bothering your client.  My friend and I are proud of our sometimes dirty feet and the work that we do to help others.  Aisha-Sky Gates/Gates Counseling at

I work with . . . 

I work with LGBTQ, polyamorous, swing, and kink communities, non-egalitarian or power exchange couples, and with all sex-positive communities.  Individuals and couples; all are welcome.  I do a lot of couples counseling and I love my work.

My authorship

My first book, Unequal Partnership:  a dating guide for loving non-egalitarian relationships, is available everywhere.  My second book, Unequal Partnerships, is due to be published in 2021.  I blog on Medium, on my own websites, and on Wellness Universe.


I want to connect with you:

Invite me to speak to your organization.
Suggest a writing or social service project for us to collaborate on.
Ask me to design a couples retreat or workshop for you.
Buy Unequal Partnership at Amazon and everywhere books are sold.  Ebook and print.  Reviews welcome.
Visit Gates Counseling (therapists, counselors, and general public are welcome).

Interview Aisha-Sky Gates, counselor, on your radio or TV show or podcast.  I'm a smooth interviewee.

Thank you.



As a presenter, Aisha is always well prepared.  From our countless conversations I found her very enthusiastic and passionate about the topics of her workshop.  She is both confident  and friendly.  As a listener, I can easily relate to her material because she explains clearly what she wants me to know.  She definitely makes herself available to people after the workshop as I remember she had to drive back late in bad weather because of that.  She constantly replies to the feedback and questions of her audience.

As a teacher, Aisha has a positive, uplifting viewpoint.  She has genuinely helpful instructions that others can benefit from. She is confident and poised as she demo'ed her presentation to me. I like her teaching method and I'm proud of her as a teacher and I am sure more people would like to hear what she has to say.---Dr. Weijia Li


Aisha-Sky Gates’ teaching and facilitation style invite students to be curious and adventurous and, therefore, her workshops are always highly engaging.                         -–James Arana


For You:

DOWNLOAD MY FREE EBOOK, Speak Up for Your Needs.

Where to Find Me

Hear my Our Better Half podcast interview with Jane Fleishman, Ph.d. and Ashley Mader, Ph.d. on considering non-traditional relationship models.  Aired September, 2018.  You can search for my name at

Visit Gates Counseling at and my author site at  Use my contact form or scheduler.  Let's talk.

Email:  [email protected]

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Awards and Affiliations

International Network of Psychotherapeutic Practice

OD, Organizational Development Network

Western Mass Coaching Association

American Counseling Association

National Coalition for Sexual Freedom

American Center for the Integration of Spiritually Transformative Experiences:

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Causes and Organizations

Planned Parenthood

National Public Radio


Unicorn Meadow Farm, a working farm that is also a spiritual center for a large, wonderful community of healers

Other causes:  positive masculinity and countering domestic violence; children's welfare.

Certifications and Credentials

Please see details on my website,

Aisha-Sky Gates

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active 1 year, 6 months ago